You’re so excited about your book that you’re showing it to everybody – your BFF, your partner, your mom and dad.
And that’s great!
Your willingness to share your work means you have the guts of steel you need to survive in this business.
But the feedback you’re getting isn’t what you’d hoped for.
You need help fixing plot holes, solving structural issues, determining if your protagonist is compelling, if your story even makes any sense.
Instead, you’re getting “It’s so good, I’m so proud of you!” or “There’s something wrong in the middle of the story, but I’m not sure how you can fix it.”
Or maybe, even worse, you’re not getting any feedback at all.
You Are Not Alone
Believe me when I tell you:
So many writers find themselves in this situation.
Everybody tells you to get a second pair of eyes on your work.
But when you’re just starting out, you may not have other writers in your life who can give you the feedback you’re looking for.
It really is only natural that you turn to the people who know you the best and love you.
But the people you love can’t offer you the editorial support you’re craving. Let’s dig into the reasons why.
All Feedback Is Not Created Equal
Even if they want to help, a lot of the people you love may not know how to read your manuscript closely enough to offer you the notes you need.
Frankly, some of the people closest to you may never have picked up a book for fun in their lives.
I know how it is. I have to pay my teenage sons to read for fun, and no, I’m not proud of that.
But I am proud of my Dessert First! process, which was born from everything I’ve learned about story in my decades of experience as a working writer (and voracious reader).
I designed Dessert First! to offer all the support I wish I’d received at the beginning of my career, and which I am excited to offer you.
When you share your book with me, I’ll read it from start to finish multiple times.
Then I’ll create an Edit Memo that takes a deep dive into structure, character development, world building, and scene mechanics.
Every.
Single.
Scene.
Then I’ll help you plan your strategy for making your revisions, logistical step by logistical step, using my Revision Wrangler tool.
I mean, even if they had the skillset, wouldn’t you feel a little guilty asking your friends and family for all that?
The people you love are unreliable narrators
In a best case scenario, your BFF, your partner, and your parents love you and want to lift you up.
If that’s the case, they won’t give you critical feedback because they don’t want to hurt your feelings.
That’s not remotely helpful if you know you have problems with the book that you’re trying to solve.
But it’s even worse if you don’t!
Thinking your book is ready because your BFF told you how great it was is a recipe for disaster.
If you’re hoping to publish traditionally, sending your book to agents before it’s ready will result in rejection and heartbreak. Most agents are overwhelmed with submissions, and only the most polished work rises to the top of their slush pile.
Even if you’re self-publishing, a half-baked book won’t be able to find an audience against hundreds of thousands of more developed projects and millions of copies of AI slop.
I’m not saying good feedback has to hurt your feelings – anything but!
In my Dessert First! Developmental Edit process, I center my critique around what’s working, first and foremost.
It’s the top sheet of my Edit Binder, so that it’s easily accessible when you’re feeling overwhelmed with revisions, and need a little pick me up.
But good feedback also focuses on strengthening the fundamental elements of story: structure, character, world building, scene work.
That’s where my Dessert First! Developmental Edits process shines.
Plus if you’re really jonesing to send your book out to agents, I’ll help you get prepared for that by walking you through writing a Quasi Query, your letter to an imaginary agent describing the future, finished book.
Never written a query letter before? Don’t worry, I’ll walk you through it! You get my query worksheet as part of our work together, and a synopsis worksheet, too.
We’re serious about getting your book into the world around here – when it’s ready!
(And THAT’S when you show the book to your BFF!)
Your friends and family don’t know what to say – so they don’t say anything at all.
I would never leave a writer hanging!
The Dessert First! Developmental Edit process begins with a Power Hour conversation, where we talk at length about your book, what you love about it, what’s not quite working, what you’re hoping to achieve in our work together.
After our initial Power Hour, you’ll get a proposal explaining the scope of services I’ll deliver, so we’re aligned in our goals.
Once we’ve signed contracts, you’ll get your own Client Portal, where you can upload your materials, track our progress on our shared timeline document, and find your Quasi Query worksheet and other goodies I share with clients.
As I’m reading and making notes, I’ll remain in touch with you, checking in to share my progress every step of the way.
When I’m done working, we’ll have another Power Hour, so you can ask questions, brainstorm solutions, and discuss new ideas and scenes you’ve conceived as a result of my notes.
Plus I’lll remain available to you via email as long as you need me.
All that feedback, zero family drama or emotional baggage. Win win!
But what about all those male authors whose wives were their secret weapons?
Okay sure, there was a period of time when lots of male authors were putting out books that leaned heavily on their wives’ abilities to edit those books to perfection.
This dynamic is so interesting and enraging to other artists that entire novels and movies have been written to pull the curtain back on those talented women who propped up their men!
But it is no longer the norm.
Despite ongoing efforts to drag us back into the Dark Ages, this is this 21st Century. Most women with those skills now write their own books, and most men don’t read widely enough to be that helpful in reverse. (Data shows that women attend college at much higher rates than men, and we outpace men as consumers in the book space, too.)
Sure, there are some partnerships today where editing each other works both ways, and works well. When both partners are writers, they can be very helpful to each other. Gosh, I know a lot of those couples myself, here in LA – but they are generally TV writer and screenplay pairs.
Granted, the only time my husband and I wrote anything together I thought I’d murder him the whole time. He thought it was a great experience, start to finish.
Take from that what you will.
When to Lean on Friends and Family
Here’s what your friends and family are great for:
Let them cheer you on when you no longer want their opinions.
Let them celebrate you when your book is done, and all you need is for them to shower you with praise and buy a zillion copies.
In the meantime, I’d recommend you protect your own sanity, protect your relationships with your loved ones, and protect your book, by looking elsewhere for editorial support.
If you’re game for the kind of feedback that will get you and your book ready for the day when you knock your loved ones’ socks off, book a Power Hour with me and let’s get that party started! When we work together, you get a ride-or-die for life. I’ll be your editor, your coach, and your new BFF who will lift you up throughout your career in this crazy business.
Comments +